Make Love In a Train, Cross Country

Well look at that, folks: it's Hump Day once again, and the associated mood is once again upon me. Today looks to be an especially steep hump for me today at the workplace, too, so it appears necessary not only to choose a great Song for the Hump Day, but to pull out the big guns as well today. Fortunately, a certain special pop legend celebrated her 52nd birthday earlier this week, and the icon in question happens to be one of the great sexual pioneers/"pop perverts" of pop music history. Yes, our lady Madonna is over the half-century mark and still sailing on, boinking 20-somethings with similarly religious names, attempting to adopt much of the non Jolie-Pitt sub-Saharan youth, and bathing daily in hundred dollar bills and caviar.
Those of us who fall firmly within the bounds of the Millenial generation no longer have the same appreciation of Madonna that our very near elders do; children of the late '90s like myself typically see her Madgesty through the post-William Orbit/Ray of Light lens, and are more likely to recall her Hard Candy album cover crotch shot than blonde ambition or conical brassieres. Luckily, somewhere along the way one of my dear friends had enough sense to browbeat me into purchasing The Immaculate Collection and actually listening the whole way through (despite my well documented dislike of most '80s pop), which is how I happened upon a pair of songs that maybe didn't change my life but definitely supplied legitimacy (and more than a few helpful pointers). Eventually I sought out the video for one of them, "Erotica," and found it to be quite what I was expecting, if I was expecting anything in particular. As edgy as it was in 1990 upon its release, the video for "Erotica" isn't quite yet totally tame by 2010 standards, but neither is it anything I hadn't seen before or felt I shouldn't be seeing. Graphic treatment of sexual themes was, after all, my forte.

It was when I encountered the video for the second number of the dirty duo that, for the first and probably only time in my life, I fully appreciated the true power and impact of Madonna's sexuality, in a visceral way I imagine was standard at the start of the 1990s: something from the pop music past that was all but impossible to relive. It wasn't because "Justify My Love" was graphic, though, just as the song itself isn't: in fact, it was quite the opposite quality that affected me so strongly, the subtlety and requirement of imagination finally proving what my dad had told me at the outset of my pubescent years: "Seeing everything is rarely half as exciting as when something is left to the imagination." To this day, the song is one of the few songs that has the capability of turning me on at least a few degrees when it plays, regardless of situation or mood or anything else.

So for this particularly hefty Hump Day, get open and ready, and enjoy Madonna's sexiest track ever, "Justify My Love."

I'm Gonna Love You Like Nothing You've Known

With the 82nd Academy Awards just a week away, all this week Vertigo Shtick will be looking back on some of the tunes that have waltzed away with Oscars for Best Original Song over the years. I imagine this retrospective will inspire equal parts nostalgia and "that won an OSCAR?!?!?!?!" incredulity. Enjoy!

Let's start off with a personal favorite of mine, written by a man who is also a personal favorite and performed by a star of whom I have a similarly high opinion. You may or may not remember Warren Beatty's 1990 B-movie Dick Tracy (a comic book movie made about ten years too early), but those for whom Madonna's acting career is defined by her Razzie-nominated turns in Swept Away and Die Another Day ought to Netflix it (well, that or A League of Their Own) for proof that the Material Girl is not totally incapable of acting. In Dick Tracy, Madonna does double duty as both supporting actress (playing femme fatale Breathless Mahoney...hey, it's better than Pussy Galore) and as a singer, providing most of the film's soundtrack of songs written by legendary Broadway genius Stephen Sondheim (Madonna's soundtrack album I'm Breathless featured songs from and inspired by the film). There are a number of standouts, naturally, but the one the Academy chose to honor with the 1990 Oscar for Best Original Song was the slinky, sultry (and oh-so-cleverly titled) "Sooner or Later (I Always Get My Man)."

Sooner Or Later - Madonna

Madonna performed the song at the ceremony on March 25, 1991, and video clips of the performance are still available across the web. It really is an endearing performance to watch, not only because Madonna is surprisingly compelling live, but because the Queen is so obviously nervous as hell: her hands shake nearly the entire number and her voice quivers just slightly as she begins the number. In a recent interview with Entertainment Weekly, longtime showrunner Bruce Vilanch recalled the star collapsing into his arms the second she'd gotten off stage, shaking and relieved to be finished (he also said he was perhaps the last man in the world who could fully appreciate having Madonna collapse in his arms). After you check out the studio recording, take a peek at the video, and see for yourself what fireworks can come of the world's biggest pop star singing a song by the world's greatest theatrical songwriter.

Time for a Celebration

Happy New Year to all! On this day of celebration of an arbitrary day to signify the latest complete orbit our planet has managed around the Sun, it seems apropos to provide you with a song to fit the mood in ways both aural and titular. Woohoo!

Celebration - Madonna

"Celebration"

Madonna

Celebration

Warner Bros, 2009

Trivia: "Celebration" was co-written and co-produced by famed DJ Paul Oakenfold, who opened for Madonna (I use the term loosely, since his set tended to finish about an hour past the ticketed start time, and Madonna typically didn't make her entrance until at least an hour later) during the North American leg of her recent Sticky and Sweet Tour. The tour was littered with famous cameos here and there, including Pharrell Williams (her collaborator on "Give It 2 Me") in New York and Miami, Britney Spears (just weeks before "Womanizer" dropped) and Justin Timberlake (her duet partner on "4 Minutes") in Los Angeles (the night I happened to attend), Timbaland (also featured in "4 Minutes") in Miami, Robyn (opening act for parts of the European leg), and DJ Benny Benassi (Rome).

Get Madonna's third greatest hits compilation album Celebration, the final album released through her contract with Warner Bros.